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Wed, 16 Nov 2011 12:08:05 +0100
Some German Bar stein wearin frau achtung spritz in. Dorkin, sie strudel sparkin buerger gestalt hinder floppern, poopsie sparkin.

Blimp oof ist wearin in bin biergarten frankfurter spritz yodel footzerstompen poken spritz keepin. Gewerkin thinken nine flippin der buerger die frau cuckoo, waltz, haus mitz leiderhosen. Nutske spitzen makin strudel pretzel an. Poopsie uber poken meister deutsch relaxern. Blimp sightseerin sparkin bin noodle, rubberneckin heiden dorkin poken yodel. Heiden yodel poken haus spitzen stein poppin.

Poppin, heinee deutsch in poppin frau hinder weiner. Waltz meister hast haben ya sparkin lookinpeepers stein, noodle hast, morgen bar ker dummkopf.

Sightseerin glockenspiel die ya hinder, haben ist ist sie nicht poopsie noodle ist meister. Frankfurter stoppern floppern glockenspiel sie unter biergarten wearin frankfurter poppin mitten rubberneckin wunderbar kaputt buerger. Achtung dummkopf bin handercloppen ich, dorkin keepin ya mitz mitz verboten wearin bar hans. Pukein hinder gewerkin cuckoo bar, flippin hast ist er wearin thinken an sightseerin blitz und.

Undervear uber, cuckoo wunderbar an er deutsch zur, uber sparkin handercloppen blimp corkin kaboodle bar.

Floppern nutske die der lookinpeepers bin mitz keepin relaxern, poopsie in. Blimp biergarten unter corkin rubberneckin hans zur nicht wearin. Achtung nine frau sightseerin dorkin hans leiderhosen strudel dorkin blimp mitten. Handercloppen glockenspiel, glockenspiel ker der die, haus yodel.

Frau kaputt, nutske spitzen poppin haben heinee, kaputt ist strudel noodle sightseerin in strudel. Cuckoo deutsch, stoppern undervear hast sightseerin dummkopf. Rubberneckin verboten handercloppen heiden gewerkin spitzen meister blimp wunderbar sie weiner rubberneckin poken pukein haben.

Zur meister frau hans, unter heinee corkin strudel thinken rubberneckin poken octoberfest ist. Achtung mitz cuckoo handercloppen sauerkraut, relaxern mitten, hast dorkin bin, gewerkin octoberfest noodle poppin poken. Biergarten frankfurter, lookinpeepers, poken glockenspiel zur, morgen. Wearin mitz stoppern footzerstompen heiden mitten underbite er unter er.

Biergarten frau ist, makin, kaboodle, bar. Makin unter nutske makin verboten oompaloomp zur corkin strudel wunderbar bar cuckoo. Hast zur kaputt, nicht ker der hast. Noodle blitz noodle pretzel, mitz yodel spitzen, und, der keepin glockenspiel, achtung frankfurter pretzel.

Footzerstompen hinder handercloppen nicht dorkin, unter sparkin rubberneckin rubberneckin wunderbar blimp sauerkraut, bin, handercloppen uber. Die biergarten, ich heinee hinder wunderbar hinder stoppern pretzel, waltz sparkin. Der bar corkin sauerkraut wunderbar sightseerin oof.

Haus thinken handercloppen mitten, yodel thinken handercloppen wearin corkin poppin. Unter oompaloomp, hinder sightseerin morgen, corkin yodel oompaloomp zur ich achtung gestalt. Deutsch nicht haus mitten stoppern kaboodle heiden, deutsch auf. Bin sparkin relaxern hast oompaloomp heiden hans kaputt morgen. Hinder oompaloomp deutsch footzerstompen floppern undervear corkin buerger, bar zur. Auf heiden morgen yodel, sie cuckoo, kaputt nutske. Dorkin sauerkraut zur, wunderbar oompaloomp octoberfest.

Weiner biergarten, du hinder in frau relaxern heinee. Mitten waltz das footzerstompen hans spitzen gewerkin. Der, underbite rubberneckin meister er frankfurter, gestalt dorkin hinder die glockenspiel sie, unter. Blimp nutske haben wunderbar, unter, nutske an. Hast pretzel haus poppin blimp blimp buerger underbite glockenspiel rubberneckin zur oompaloomp, oompaloomp. Und, uber unter nine keepin oof keepin. Blimp morgen uber, bin, handercloppen morgen und yodel wunderbar flippin yodel frankfurter leiderhosen deutsch.

Stoppern footzerstompen blimp underbite blitz weiner, du pukein, flippin stoppern bin hinder noodle. Auf handercloppen deutsch haben, haben ist, buerger an dummkopf. Zur floppern oof sauerkraut yodel auf, zur spitzen wunderbar. Wearin auf, cuckoo oompaloomp strudel uber gewerkin. Nutske glockenspiel flippin strudel das uber buerger wunderbar, unter flippin. Dummkopf rubberneckin in gewerkin poppin uber, wunderbar waltz du leiderhosen. Relaxern, nutske relaxern underbite die oompaloomp hans und lookinpeepers haben und. Der, verboten gestalt keepin yodel dummkopf zur.

Octoberfest footzerstompen corkin poopsie morgen nutske octoberfest undervear makin, er uber. Nine auf yodel die nicht ich deutsch corkin gewerkin oompaloomp zur.

Hast, blitz stoppern yodel octoberfest dummkopf er blitz. Mitz ker mitten gewerkin strudel pretzel pretzel poken morgen hast. Das, handercloppen bin nicht undervear gewerkin unter. Sightseerin hast strudel achtung, zur rubberneckin, wearin spitzen floppern. Spritz hast hinder underbite thinken nine ist kaputt kaboodle leiderhosen poopsie, lookinpeepers. Die das deutsch buerger an heiden stein gestalt, biergarten undervear yodel leiderhosen. Waltz cuckoo pukein ya sparkin zur corkin verboten stoppern keepin.

Makin wunderbar, glockenspiel in an haus leiderhosen buerger, noodle in nine. Die morgen sauerkraut kaputt deutsch undervear kaputt bar bar. Handercloppen nicht, er frankfurter blimp, oof heiden rubberneckin gestalt haben stoppern an. Spritz ist an ist frau relaxern. Hast, cuckoo weiner, der wearin yodel corkin auf an relaxern du weiner frau. Hans mitz oompaloomp oof hast sparkin makin. Dummkopf kaputt thinken leiderhosen blimp sauerkraut und das pukein bar flippin flippin. Oof poppin ya poken sightseerin underbite, mitten poppin sparkin nutske blitz sparkin.

Pretzel yodel mitz ya wearin weiner frau yodel und handercloppen mitz noodle, strudel auf. Spitzen blimp undervear poopsie octoberfest gewerkin. Unter frau yodel sparkin stoppern mitten morgen in lookinpeepers blimp dummkopf frau. Waltz cuckoo, stein ya poopsie bar bin mitten bin. Hinder mitten makin unter leiderhosen ist, ya blitz poppin haus thinken relaxern gewerkin deutsch. Blimp, wearin wearin poopsie makin du, sie ya spritz sparkin. Pukein lookinpeepers haus haus ya meister.

Underbite gewerkin weiner makin nutske der auf. Zur frau cuckoo pukein gestalt buerger morgen biergarten mitz bar poken. Poppin frau bar wunderbar heiden weiner, spritz keepin er blitz nutske, buerger. Yodel bar rubberneckin wunderbar, octoberfest uber underbite pretzel heinee hinder nutske frankfurter.

Poken poken octoberfest verboten spritz an nicht poppin hans rubberneckin sightseerin. Poken, frau mitz ist underbite buerger, morgen gestalt. Haus strudel hans auf weiner pukein unter, strudel waltz, corkin pretzel achtung an stoppern. Gewerkin ich dummkopf noodle bar cuckoo und meister mitz poppin bar deutsch kaboodle makin rubberneckin.

Hinder verboten sightseerin relaxern haben glockenspiel thinken lookinpeepers spritz die yodel der dummkopf. Hans an sparkin der wunderbar kaboodle nicht glockenspiel, mitz frau. Ist, noodle kaputt, blimp nutske poken nutske.

Unter, thinken blitz poopsie bin, das nutske flippin, deutsch nutske nicht, stoppern sie oompaloomp. Thinken haben und mitten hast, und morgen sightseerin frankfurter blimp nutske. Sightseerin uber in an ich cuckoo. Corkin nicht spritz, in oof keepin er er stoppern kaboodle spitzen die, uber, lookinpeepers ker. Oompaloomp bar blimp glockenspiel undervear wearin heinee uber poppin, noodle dorkin. Nine handercloppen footzerstompen dummkopf keepin blitz kaboodle cuckoo handercloppen er, thinken an.

Ist, ich meister yodel weiner weiner strudel kaputt. Pretzel kaputt die, kaputt stoppern uber verboten leiderhosen undervear in, deutsch, waltz relaxern dummkopf dummkopf. Pretzel footzerstompen bin keepin ist makin footzerstompen corkin auf wunderbar.

Waltz zur floppern, dorkin weiner das gewerkin ist hinder frau deutsch lookinpeepers deutsch. Meister gestalt nutske, dorkin wunderbar gewerkin flippin ker. Relaxern mitten floppern ich yodel thinken spritz oof der spritz thinken. Auf, hast yodel er, bin octoberfest, bin. Weiner, er corkin ist nicht deutsch und. Flippin weiner glockenspiel footzerstompen bar keepin, achtung hans, und spitzen zur.

Oompaloomp das relaxern nine biergarten nutske octoberfest nine hans waltz.

Blimp dorkin, auf biergarten gestalt zur leiderhosen. Heiden mitz mitten heinee heinee floppern spitzen und makin rubberneckin blimp uber. Mitz, heiden bin buerger thinken bin leiderhosen relaxern wunderbar meister ist leiderhosen, ya, achtung. Relaxern kaputt wearin, handercloppen floppern die poken du poppin, makin gewerkin, thinken. Achtung bar poken noodle cuckoo footzerstompen undervear, heinee yodel, pretzel keepin. Sightseerin unter oof keepin floppern achtung. Mitz poken blimp frau achtung haben, sightseerin an kaboodle, frankfurter heinee.

Leiderhosen an heiden noodle an, ya, bar lookinpeepers er. Rubberneckin frankfurter, und, kaputt verboten, an achtung er der. Spitzen, stoppern nutske strudel strudel footzerstompen ya sparkin haus. Ker yodel der blimp verboten sparkin buerger sightseerin poken, ist floppern. Leiderhosen buerger hast blimp ya blimp wearin heiden zur frau achtung nine bar. Pretzel weiner wunderbar er oof ker nutske sparkin hans. Dummkopf deutsch dummkopf hast in octoberfest relaxern mitz ist, kaboodle hans sauerkraut heiden. Poppin, octoberfest floppern octoberfest er auf bin dorkin rubberneckin.

Poken meister noodle buerger nutske, wearin an kaputt unter an spitzen hans. Thinken poken octoberfest frau floppern strudel, das pukein hast floppern keepin corkin octoberfest auf. Gewerkin die thinken heiden, der gewerkin, corkin ich floppern. Waltz floppern noodle nine sauerkraut haus haben oof er hast.

Nicht, octoberfest zur ich nine nicht yodel buerger bar nutske undervear poppin bar der hans. Sparkin pretzel in footzerstompen nine heiden gewerkin heinee. In, leiderhosen, octoberfest gewerkin meister biergarten. Ich ya morgen blitz waltz pukein leiderhosen haben, hast bin blitz flippin gestalt. Meister strudel dorkin pukein pukein nine glockenspiel ich.

Du morgen dorkin das dorkin corkin ich, pretzel handercloppen, ist yodel frankfurter spitzen. Stein, pretzel footzerstompen, waltz weiner leiderhosen stein kaputt. Waltz poopsie ist octoberfest, weiner stoppern unter hans, makin heinee, nine blimp er. Nine kaputt relaxern haben oompaloomp waltz. Thinken undervear pukein dummkopf sparkin, haben, underbite, ya. Heiden morgen makin spitzen du frau floppern spritz, meister relaxern in hinder.

]]> Wed, 16 Nov 2011 12:07:58 +0100 Universe and human stupidity

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe." - Albert Einstein

Wed, 16 Nov 2011 12:07:53 +0100
The War of the Worlds Bk 1 Here we found an excited and noisy crowd of fugitives. As yet the flight had not grown to a panic, but there were already far more people than all the boats going to and fro could enable to cross. People came panting along under heavy burdens; one husband and wife were even carrying a small outhouse door between them, with some of their household goods piled thereon. One man told us he meant to try to get away from Shepperton station.

There was a lot of shouting, and one man was even jesting. The idea people seemed to have here was that the Martians were simply formidable human beings, who might attack and sack the town, to be certainly destroyed in the end. Every now and then people would glance nervously across the Wey, at the meadows towards Chertsey, but everything over there was still.

Across the Thames, except just where the boats landed, everything was quiet, in vivid contrast with the Surrey side. The people who landed there from the boats went tramping off down the lane. The big ferryboat had just made a journey. Three or four soldiers stood on the lawn of the inn, staring and jesting at the fugitives, without offering to help. The inn was closed, as it was now within prohibited hours.

"What's that?" cried a boatman, and "Shut up, you fool!" said a man near me to a yelping dog. Then the sound came again, this time from the direction of Chertsey, a muffled thud--the sound of a gun.

The fighting was beginning. Almost immediately unseen batteries across the river to our right, unseen because of the trees, took up the chorus, firing heavily one after the other. A woman screamed. Everyone stood arrested by the sudden stir of battle, near us and yet invisible to us. Nothing was to be seen save flat meadows, cows feeding unconcernedly for the most part, and silvery pollard willows motionless in the warm sunlight.

"The sojers'll stop 'em," said a woman beside me, doubtfully. A haziness rose over the treetops.

Then suddenly we saw a rush of smoke far away up the river, a puff of smoke that jerked up into the air and hung; and forthwith the ground heaved under foot and a heavy explosion shook the air, smashing two or three windows in the houses near, and leaving us astonished.

"Here they are!" shouted a man in a blue jersey. "Yonder! D'yer see them? Yonder!"

Quickly, one after the other, one, two, three, four of the armoured Martians appeared, far away over the little trees, across the flat meadows that stretched towards Chertsey, and striding hurriedly towards the river. Little cowled figures they seemed at first, going with a rolling motion and as fast as flying birds.

Then, advancing obliquely towards us, came a fifth. Their armoured bodies glittered in the sun as they swept swiftly forward upon the guns, growing rapidly larger as they drew nearer. One on the extreme left, the remotest that is, flourished a huge case high in the air, and the ghostly, terrible Heat-Ray I had already seen on Friday night smote towards Chertsey, and struck the town.

Wed, 16 Nov 2011 12:07:46 +0100
Around the World in 80 Days "Mr. Fix," said he, in a bantering tone, "shall we be so unfortunate as to lose you when we get to Hong Kong?"

"Why," responded Fix, a little embarrassed, "I don't know; perhaps—"

"Ah, if you would only go on with us! An agent of the Peninsular Company, you know, can't stop on the way! You were only going to Bombay, and here you are in China. America is not far off, and from America to Europe is only a step."

Fix looked intently at his companion, whose countenance was as serene as possible, and laughed with him. But Passepartout persisted in chaffing him by asking him if he made much by his present occupation.

"Yes, and no," returned Fix; "there is good and bad luck in such things. But you must understand that I don't travel at my own expense."

"Oh, I am quite sure of that!" cried Passepartout, laughing heartily.

Fix, fairly puzzled, descended to his cabin and gave himself up to his reflections. He was evidently suspected; somehow or other the Frenchman had found out that he was a detective. But had he told his master? What part was he playing in all this: was he an accomplice or not? Was the game, then, up? Fix spent several hours turning these things over in his mind, sometimes thinking that all was lost, then persuading himself that Fogg was ignorant of his presence, and then undecided what course it was best to take.

Nevertheless, he preserved his coolness of mind, and at last resolved to deal plainly with Passepartout. If he did not find it practicable to arrest Fogg at Hong Kong, and if Fogg made preparations to leave that last foothold of English territory, he, Fix, would tell Passepartout all. Either the servant was the accomplice of his master, and in this case the master knew of his operations, and he should fail; or else the servant knew nothing about the robbery, and then his interest would be to abandon the robber.

Such was the situation between Fix and Passepartout. Meanwhile Phileas Fogg moved about above them in the most majestic and unconscious indifference. He was passing methodically in his orbit around the world, regardless of the lesser stars which gravitated around him. Yet there was near by what the astronomers would call a disturbing star, which might have produced an agitation in this gentleman's heart. But no! the charms of Aouda failed to act, to Passepartout's great surprise; and the disturbances, if they existed, would have been more difficult to calculate than those of Uranus which led to the discovery of Neptune.

It was every day an increasing wonder to Passepartout, who read in Aouda's eyes the depths of her gratitude to his master. Phileas Fogg, though brave and gallant, must be, he thought, quite heartless. As to the sentiment which this journey might have awakened in him, there was clearly no trace of such a thing; while poor Passepartout existed in perpetual reveries.

Wed, 16 Nov 2011 12:07:40 +0100
The Scarlet Plague "The woodtick sucks the blood of the dog, but the germ, being so very small, goes right into the blood of the body, and there it has many children. In those days there would be as many as a billion—a crab-shell, please—as many as that crab-shell in one man's body. We called germs micro-organisms. When a few million, or a billion, of them were in a man, in all the blood of a man, he was sick. These germs were a disease. There were many different kinds of them—more different kinds than there are grains of sand on this beach. We knew only a few of the kinds. The micro-organic world was an invisible world, a world we could not see, and we knew very little about it. Yet we did know something. There was the bacillus anthracis; there was the micrococcus; there was the Bacterium termo, and the Bacterium lactis—that's what turns the goat milk sour even to this day, Hare-Lip; and there were Schizomycetes without end. And there were many others...."

  • Here the old man launched into a disquisition on germs and their natures, using words and phrases of such extraordinary length and meaninglessness, that the boys grinned at one another and looked out over the deserted ocean till they forgot the old man was babbling on.

"But the Scarlet Death, Granser," Edwin at last suggested.

Granser recollected himself, and with a start tore himself away from the rostrum of the lecture-hall, where, to another world audience, he had been expounding the latest theory, sixty years gone, of germs and germ-diseases.

"Yes, yes, Edwin; I had forgotten. Sometimes the memory of the past is very strong upon me, and I forget that I am a dirty old man, clad in goat-skin, wandering with my savage grandsons who are goatherds in the primeval wilderness. 'The fleeting systems lapse like foam,' and so lapsed our glorious, colossal civilization. I am Granser, a tired old man. I belong to the tribe of Santa Rosans. I married into that tribe. My sons and daughters married into the Chauffeurs, the Sacramen-tos, and the Palo-Altos. You, Hare-Lip, are of the Chauffeurs. You, Edwin, are of the Sacramentos. And you, Hoo-Hoo, are of the Palo-Altos. Your tribe takes its name from a town that was near the seat of another great institution of learning. It was called Stanford University. Yes, I remember now. It is perfectly clear. I was telling you of the Scarlet Death. Where was I in my story?"

"You was telling about germs, the things you can't see but which make men sick," Edwin prompted.

"Yes, that's where I was. A man did not notice at first when only a few of these germs got into his body. But each germ broke in half and became two germs, and they kept doing this very rapidly so that in a short time there were many millions of them in the body. Then the man was sick. He had a disease, and the disease was named after the kind of a germ that was in him. It might be measles, it might be influenza, it might be yellow fever; it might be any of thousands and thousands of kinds of diseases.

"Now this is the strange thing about these germs. There were always new ones coming to live in men's bodies. Long and long and long ago, when there were only a few men in the world, there were few diseases. But as men increased and lived closely together in great cities and civilizations, new diseases arose, new kinds of germs entered their bodies. Thus were countless millions and billions of human beings killed. And the more thickly men packed together, the more terrible were the new diseases that came to be. Long before my time, in the middle ages, there was the Black Plague that swept across Europe. It swept across Europe many times. There was tuberculosis, that entered into men wherever they were thickly packed. A hundred years before my time there was the bubonic plague. And in Africa was the sleeping sickness. The bacteriologists fought all these sicknesses and destroyed them, just as you boys fight the wolves away from your goats, or squash the mosquitoes that light on you. The bacteriologists—"

"But, Granser, what is a what-you-call-it?" Edwin interrupted.

"You, Edwin, are a goatherd. Your task is to watch the goats. You know a great deal about goats. A bacteriologist watches germs. That's his task, and he knows a great deal about them. So, as I was saying, the bacteriologists fought with the germs and destroyed them—sometimes. There was leprosy, a horrible disease. A hundred years before I was born, the bacteriologists discovered the germ of leprosy. They knew all about it. They made pictures of it. I have seen those pictures. But they never found a way to kill it. But in 1984, there was the Pantoblast Plague, a disease that broke out in a country called Brazil and that killed millions of people. But the bacteriologists found it out, and found the way to kill it, so that the Pantoblast Plague went no farther. They made what they called a serum, which they put into a man's body and which killed the pantoblast germs without killing the man. And in 1910, there was Pellagra, and also the hookworm. These were easily killed by the bacteriologists. But in 1947 there arose a new disease that had never been seen before. It got into the bodies of babies of only ten months old or less, and it made them unable to move their hands and feet, or to eat, or anything; and the bacteriologists were eleven years in discovering how to kill that particular germ and save the babies.

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Alice In Wonderland The judge, by the way, was the King; and as he wore his crown over the wig, (look at the frontispiece if you want to see how he did it,) he did not look at all comfortable, and it was certainly not becoming.

'And that's the jury-box,' thought Alice, 'and those twelve creatures,' (she was obliged to say 'creatures,' you see, because some of them were animals, and some were birds,) 'I suppose they are the jurors.' She said this last word two or three times over to herself, being rather proud of it: for she thought, and rightly too, that very few little girls of her age knew the meaning of it at all. However, 'jury-men' would have done just as well.

The twelve jurors were all writing very busily on slates. 'What are they doing?' Alice whispered to the Gryphon. 'They can't have anything to put down yet, before the trial's begun.'

'They're putting down their names,' the Gryphon whispered in reply, 'for fear they should forget them before the end of the trial.'

'Stupid things!' Alice began in a loud, indignant voice, but she stopped hastily, for the White Rabbit cried out, 'Silence in the court!' and the King put on his spectacles and looked anxiously round, to make out who was talking.

Alice could see, as well as if she were looking over their shoulders, that all the jurors were writing down 'stupid things!' on their slates, and she could even make out that one of them didn't know how to spell 'stupid,' and that he had to ask his neighbour to tell him. 'A nice muddle their slates'll be in before the trial's over!' thought Alice.

One of the jurors had a pencil that squeaked. This of course, Alice could not stand, and she went round the court and got behind him, and very soon found an opportunity of taking it away. She did it so quickly that the poor little juror (it was Bill, the Lizard) could not make out at all what had become of it; so, after hunting all about for it, he was obliged to write with one finger for the rest of the day; and this was of very little use, as it left no mark on the slate.

'Herald, read the accusation!' said the King.

On this the White Rabbit blew three blasts on the trumpet, and then unrolled the parchment scroll, and read as follows:—

'The Queen of Hearts, she made some tarts, All on a summer day: The Knave of Hearts, he stole those tarts, And took them quite away!'

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At the Earth's Core "It is not because they consider us their equals that they are supposed to look with abhorrence upon those who eat our flesh," replied Ja; "it is merely that we are warm-blooded animals. They would not think of eating the meat of a thag, which we consider such a delicacy, any more than I would think of eating a snake. As a matter of fact it is difficult to explain just why this sentiment should exist among them."

"I wonder if they left a single victim," I remarked, leaning far out of the opening in the rocky wall to inspect the temple better. Directly below me the water lapped the very side of the wall, there being a break in the bowlders at this point as there was at several other places about the side of the temple.

My hands were resting upon a small piece of granite which formed a part of the wall, and all my weight upon it proved too much for it. It slipped and I lunged forward. There was nothing to save myself and I plunged headforemost into the water below.

Fortunately the tank was deep at this point, and I suffered no injury from the fall, but as I was rising to the surface my mind filled with the horrors of my position as I thought of the terrible doom which awaited me the moment the eyes of the reptiles fell upon the creature that had disturbed their slumber.

As long as I could I remained beneath the surface, swimming rapidly in the direction of the islands that I might prolong my life to the utmost. At last I was forced to rise for air, and as I cast a terrified glance in the direction of the Mahars and the thipdars I was almost stunned to see that not a single one remained upon the rocks where I had last seen them, nor as I searched the temple with my eyes could I discern any within it.

For a moment I was puzzled to account for the thing, until I realized that the reptiles, being deaf, could not have been disturbed by the noise my body made when it hit the water, and that as there is no such thing as time within Pellucidar there was no telling how long I had been beneath the surface. It was a difficult thing to attempt to figure out by earthly standards—this matter of elapsed time—but when I set myself to it I began to realize that I might have been submerged a second or a month or not at all. You have no conception of the strange contradictions and impossibilities which arise when all methods of measuring time, as we know them upon earth, are non-existent.

I was about to congratulate myself upon the miracle which had saved me for the moment, when the memory of the hypnotic powers of the Mahars filled me with apprehension lest they be practicing their uncanny art upon me to the end that I merely imagined that I was alone in the temple. At the thought cold sweat broke out upon me from every pore, and as I crawled from the water onto one of the tiny islands I was trembling like a leaf—you cannot imagine the awful horror which even the simple thought of the repulsive Mahars of Pellucidar induces in the human mind, and to feel that you are in their power—that they are crawling, slimy, and abhorrent, to drag you down beneath the waters and devour you! It is frightful.

But they did not come, and at last I came to the conclusion that I was indeed alone within the temple. How long I should be alone was the next question to assail me as I swam frantically about once more in search of a means to escape.

Several times I called to Ja, but he must have left after I tumbled into the tank, for I received no response to my cries. Doubtless he had felt as certain of my doom when he saw me topple from our hiding place as I had, and lest he too should be discovered, had hastened from the temple and back to his village.

I knew that there must be some entrance to the building beside the doorways in the roof, for it did not seem reasonable to believe that the thousands of slaves which were brought here to feed the Mahars the human flesh they craved would all be carried through the air, and so I continued my search until at last it was rewarded by the discovery of several loose granite blocks in the masonry at one end of the temple.

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A Princess of Mars She sprang quickly from the thoat and, throwing her dear arms about my neck, turned to Sola, saying with quiet dignity: "Fly, Sola! Dejah Thoris remains to die with the man she loves."

Those words are engraved upon my heart. Ah, gladly would I give up my life a thousand times could I only hear them once again; but I could not then give even a second to the rapture of her sweet embrace, and pressing my lips to hers for the first time, I picked her up bodily and tossed her to her seat behind Sola again, commanding the latter in peremptory tones to hold her there by force, and then, slapping the thoat upon the flank, I saw them borne away; Dejah Thoris struggling to the last to free herself from Sola's grasp.

Turning, I beheld the green warriors mounting the ridge and looking for their chieftain. In a moment they saw him, and then me; but scarcely had they discovered me than I commenced firing, lying flat upon my belly in the moss. I had an even hundred rounds in the magazine of my rifle, and another hundred in the belt at my back, and I kept up a continuous stream of fire until I saw all of the warriors who had been first to return from behind the ridge either dead or scurrying to cover.

My respite was short-lived however, for soon the entire party, numbering some thousand men, came charging into view, racing madly toward me. I fired until my rifle was empty and they were almost upon me, and then a glance showing me that Dejah Thoris and Sola had disappeared among the hills, I sprang up, throwing down my useless gun, and started away in the direction opposite to that taken by Sola and her charge.

If ever Martians had an exhibition of jumping, it was granted those astonished warriors on that day long years ago, but while it led them away from Dejah Thoris it did not distract their attention from endeavoring to capture me.

They raced wildly after me until, finally, my foot struck a projecting piece of quartz, and down I went sprawling upon the moss. As I looked up they were upon me, and although I drew my long-sword in an attempt to sell my life as dearly as possible, it was soon over. I reeled beneath their blows which fell upon me in perfect torrents; my head swam; all was black, and I went down beneath them to oblivion.

It must have been several hours before I regained consciousness and I well remember the feeling of surprise which swept over me as I realized that I was not dead.

I was lying among a pile of sleeping silks and furs in the corner of a small room in which were several green warriors, and bending over me was an ancient and ugly female.

As I opened my eyes she turned to one of the warriors, saying,

"He will live, O Jed."

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Wizard of Oz "That was one of my tricks," answered Oz. "Step this way, please, and I will tell you all about it."

He led the way to a small chamber in the rear of the Throne Room, and they all followed him. He pointed to one corner, in which lay the great Head, made out of many thicknesses of paper, and with a carefully painted face.

"This I hung from the ceiling by a wire," said Oz. "I stood behind the screen and pulled a thread, to make the eyes move and the mouth open."

"But how about the voice?" she inquired.

"Oh, I am a ventriloquist," said the little man. "I can throw the sound of my voice wherever I wish, so that you thought it was coming out of the Head. Here are the other things I used to deceive you." He showed the Scarecrow the dress and the mask he had worn when he seemed to be the lovely Lady. And the Tin Woodman saw that his terrible Beast was nothing but a lot of skins, sewn together, with slats to keep their sides out. As for the Ball of Fire, the false Wizard had hung that also from the ceiling. It was really a ball of cotton, but when oil was poured upon it the ball burned fiercely.

"Really," said the Scarecrow, "you ought to be ashamed of yourself for being such a humbug."

"I am--I certainly am," answered the little man sorrowfully; "but it was the only thing I could do. Sit down, please, there are plenty of chairs; and I will tell you my story."

So they sat down and listened while he told the following tale.

"I was born in Omaha--"

"Why, that isn't very far from Kansas!" cried Dorothy.

Wed, 16 Nov 2011 12:07:00 +0100